I see you. Your beautiful hair pulled up, your bangs swept across. The elastic on your T-shirt is tattered and pulled, no doubt from the countless requests for milk each day. It exposes your regal collarbones. The throne on which sits your precious breasts, nourishing him day after day. Connecting you. For life. When you stand up tall, you look fearless. A queen. How you deserve to...
Parenting
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Left Behind
I feel left behind. Many emails that I’m receiving and pictures I’m seeing on social media depict a “post Covid” world. A world in which folks are no longer wearing masks, or keeping their distance from each other. I see people taking long postponed vacations, rescheduling weddings and having big parties. Getting on planes, going about their lives as if...
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There’s milk and a sweet smell. The bed sheets, mangled. The bed is gravity—I slink toward it, whether I want to or not. I live in a body I do not know. A lot of people never bounce back. I went through a big thing but no one wants to hear about it. It’s too hot and I’m not used...
Promoted to Full Time Mom
About to be promoted…. To full time stay at home mom. We’ve been lucky- she’s almost 7 months old and my husband has been home the whole time. He quit his job in December 2019 because his boss was a jackass. Then IVF happened. Then COVID-19 happened. Then (thank god) pregnancy happened. Then baby happened. So here we are, nearly...
Sleep
You just fell asleep in my arms nursing while I read you one of my favorite books - Wherever You Go My Love Will Find You by Nancy Tillman. Your eyelids got heavy, and you closed your eyes as I read this passage: In the green of the grass...in the smell of the sea...in the clouds floating by...at the top...
Limitless
“So the stars really go on forever?” “That’s what appears to be true, at least that’s all we know at this point. The universe just keeps growing.” “And numbers also go forever. I used to think I could only count up to 100. But now I know I could count forever.” “Yes, baby, that’s also true.” “Well that’s how I...
She's Moving Out
The boxes are packed, they sit in the hallway waiting to be put into the moving truck to take my Bean off to college. I feel so good. I have been waiting for the day when she could fly from the nest and courageously live her life. I am so excited for her and so very proud of her and what it...
All of It
Enlightening because I was able to accomplish so much while she played contentedly ALONE for like almost 2 hours. Like seriously. I made mini muffins - she was fine; I cleaned the kitchen - she was fine. I did a load of laundry - fine. I decided to just clean sinks, fine, so I cleaned bathroom and shower, fine, toilet...
Finding That Good Feeling
I sit down at my computer after receiving a beautiful calling and invitation to join Motherhood Pages as a writer, creator, mother, and woman unfolding on her journey. I delight in the ‘good feeling’ of feeling confident, open and secure enough to express myself. For me, that last part is important to salute “…feeling confident, open and secure enough to...