What is Motherhood Pages?
Motherhood Pages is a collaborative journal of mothers. These pages feature passionate writers openly sharing their experiences with motherhood – first birthdays, identity shifts, sexuality – as they grapple with the hardest and most rewarding pieces of mothering. The intention is that each piece is like a page ripped out from their journals. There are no “how-tos,” no unsolicited advice or suggestions (the internet has quite enough of that noise) – just real mothers letting you into their deepest feelings on one of the most vulnerable, heart wrenching and fulfilling roles that exists – mothering and aspiring to be a mother.
I find myself writing while holding my sleeping child, at all hours of the night, creative juices and tears flowing, pouring my heart out about my own shift in identity, his transition into toddlerhood, feeling pulled in a thousand directions, questioning my decisions some nights and feeling completely sure of myself other nights. Friends have also shared their poetry and journal entries with me, alight with the passion and tumult of mothering. Their words are powerful; they share the evolution of their relationships with their partners after having a baby and the beautiful ways they see themselves and their children evolving. I see myself echoed in their words, and that gives me strength – sometimes strength I didn’t know I had.
This is for those who see parenting as an opportunity for growth, self reflection, and a call to action. Those who feel deeply, value their stories and experiences, and want to share them with others who may be feeling alone or in need of a mirror that helps them see their own strength and confidence in mothering.
The truth is that you don’t receive a new identity the moment you hold your child and are deemed “Mother.” You emerge anew, but the process of integrating this new identity is lifelong, and it’s definitely rocky at first. We’re becoming. We’re in transition. We’re trying to feel out who we are now and how we move around in this new world where we are not the same – no matter how we look to those on the outside. These writings are a testament to that. We need to hear others’ voices as we navigate this new terrain, voices that are comforting and resonate and reflect that we’re going through something similar collectively.
This project was born out of my love for words, stories, and the power of sharing in circle with other women. Historically, we mothered in villages, watching others parent and sharing in the work of raising children; the generations before us passed down knowledge and wisdom organically through experience and exposure. In our more isolated societies of today, we have to fight for this kind of connection, and my hope is that these words and wisdom will make you feel comforted, less alone, and inspired to allow the mother within you to develop and thrive.
Hi, I’m Melissa Brooke. I’m the mother of a three year old named Jonah and an educator. I’ve worked in the sexual health education field, taught elementary school, taught yoga and meditation, and supported women with postpartum education and recovery. The role that’s challenging me the most to shift my deepest patterns and find my deepest confidence is the one I’m currently doing full-time: mothering. This site was born out of my struggles around Jonah turning one year old and finding nothing of substance that others had written on the topic. It was hard to find anyone writing about the mixed emotions of joy, grief, rage – all of it. I want there to be a honest space for that. When I started creating this site, he was just over a year old. I’ve written most of my journal entries while holding my sleeping son. I celebrate my wins, relish in the richness of this experience, and express my rage and confusion and doubt. I am more pointed in my writing now since having a child; I don’t hold back, I don’t analyze as much. I find more conviction in my words and give more credence to my experience now. I’m a lover of words and connection, and I want to create the very online space I’ve always searched for – the one that feels like a sigh of relief and a hug in the middle of the night, the one that builds up my confidence as a mother and helps me find my own voice, the one that provides regulation and comfort via storytelling and sharing.
I get overwhelmed with the “how to’s” and parenting advice permeating the internet, especially in times when I already doubt myself. I rarely find solace engaging in online forums or in typical parenting communities where the focus is on solving “problems” I don’t usually even see as problems to begin with. I want to be present with my son, and I want to prioritize rest when I can, so I try to block out the noise and listen within.
Melissa Brooke
Founder & Writer
Thus, my intention here is to invite you into an intimate circle of friends by offering writings on the nitty gritty topics affecting mothers. Their words are meant to read like journal entries – personal, intimate reflections, straight from the heart. Motherhood Pages honors the power of stories and space-holding to help name and integrate our feelings so we can feel empowered and draw lasting self assuredness from our experiences.
Ultimately, It’s not really about what babies do or don’t do. It’s about mothers. It’s about how we are becoming through each decision and moment – big and small. Woven into the ordinary moments of each day are people finding their footing as mothers, finding the sacred in the mundane and drawing that out for themselves and their children. This project is a celebration of that.
I am in your corner. I hope some words find you that build you up and help you see the well of strength deep inside you. Please feel free to reach out any time. I’d love to hear from you.
With love,
Melissa
I hope you find your own strength and your own path from the words and hearts on these pages. We are not walking this path alone.
Writers
Melissa Brooke
Founder & Writer
Melissa is the mother of a 3 year old named Jonah, the founder of Motherhood Pages, and an educator. She's worked in the sexual health education field, taught elementary school, taught yoga and meditation, and supported women with postpartum education and recovery. The role that’s challenging her the most to shift her deepest patterns and find her deepest confidence is the one she's currently doing full-time: mothering.
Joanie Baumgardner
Writer
Joanie is a stay at home mom to 6 month old Brooke. She has a background in the performing and healing arts, and has always loved writing. The road to Brooke was long and complicated, with IVF as part of the story. She loves to connect with folks about her struggles with infertility, mental health, and mothering. She's passionate about dispelling stigmas, supporting marginalized communities, and learning how to be a more impactful ally. Being a stay at home mom is "all she's ever wanted" but amongst the starry eyed feeling of a dream fulfilled, she is now experiencing the multifaceted challenges of parenthood.
Zoe Etkin
Writer
Zoë Etkin is a Postpartum & Motherhood Transformation Guide, doula, scar tissue remediation practitioner, co-founder of Embodied Doula Trainings, author, and mother. Her chapbook, Cetacea Vaginae (Another New Calligraphy) and her poetic memoir, The Birth & Death of Girl (Spuyten Duyvil) were both published in 2018. She has also authored The Embodied Pregnancy Journal, and has a forthcoming journal out soon, Who Am I Now? A Postpartum Identity Journal. Her next poetry book, The Mother Myths, is forthcoming from Motherhood Pages in early 2022. Her poems have been featured in [PANK], Juked, Word Riot, and others. Find more at www.thememphisdoula.com.
Samantha Carnell
Writer
I'm honored to join this lovely band of mothers who write with humor and heart about the experience of motherhood. My husband and I have one son, age four, who is the apple of both our eyes. I am currently homeschooling our son and very much enjoying the freedom and flexibility that choice affords us day-to-day. I am a geriatic social worker by training, and prior to my son's birth, I worked in a clinical setting providing emotional and practical support to individuals and families caring for someone with Alzheimer's or other forms of dementia. Similar to that of first-time parents, family caregivers care for a vulnerable person who cannot care for themselves - it's a 24/7 job and the learning curve is sharp. As a first-time mother to my son, now four, I've found myself on the other side of the coin, seeking non-judgemental support, wisdom, and experience of others when struggling with doubt, frustration, and myriad other emotions that arise for parents. I'm hoping that the experiences I share here can provide some comfort and solidarity along this challenging, gratifying, and humbling journey we know as Motherhood. My favorite ways to spend time with my son are reading together and snuggling in the mornings. In my personal time, I enjoy reading fiction and non-fiction, studying and growing vegetables and California native plants, and watching Curb Your Enthusiasm (again) with my husband.
Jessica Kent
Writer
Hi, I am Jessica, and I am so happy you are here. I define my journey of motherhood by the middle path, between the natural human animal and the “civilized” culture we have inherited. I know my role as mother is one of the most important in my children’s lives. I also know that as embodied beings they are on their own soul journey and the best thing I can do is get out of the way. Again … both/and. My musings here share my journey of remembering and the wisdom that comes through the moments of mothering when we pay attention. At my very core, I believe community and the village is what the world needs most. Together, we will raise the next generation.
Sara Goss
Writer
Sara is a wife and mother to two toddlers as well as a school-based speech and language pathologist. Sara's two primary roles as mother and clinician inform one another, as she applies her language expertise to parenting and her responsive parenting approach to her work. She believes the way we interact with and understand young people should be individualized with care, in the hope of raising and teaching resilient, confident and empathetic little humans. No doubt this objective is mentally and emotionally taxing, yet these challenges are what make us who we are: strong mothers determined to try our best doing the most important work of all - mothering.
Risa Ora
Writer
Risa lives in the Pacific Northwest with her eight-year-old son. She was unschooled for most of her life, and is passionate about holistic nutrition education, herbalism, and integrative healthcare. She loves hip hop, dance, graffiti, writing, making art, forests, and staying up too late hysterically laughing at memes. Risa makes a living helping companies design and manage their employee benefits programs, and believes weaving irreverence throughout all areas of life keeps you young forever.
Mala Madrone
Writer
Mala is a mother to two bright shining girls. She lives in the High Desert of New Mexico with her partner. Together they are a two-mom family, raising their children with a deep appreciation for the seasons and the natural wilderness around them. Mala is a full-time hearth tending mom, who is currently homeschooling her children and being re-educated in rhythm and trust and love. She loves studying the body — she is a trained body-worker with training in biodynamic cranio-sacral therapy, myofascial release, and yoga as a therapeutic for deep healing. She also holds certifications in sex education and holistic sexual wellness.
Celina Wigle-Olias-Varga
Writer
Celina Wigle-Olias-Varga wears many hats as a Postpartum Doula, Sexual Wholeness Mentor, published poet, co-founder of the doula training organization Embodied Doula Trainings, graduate student, wife, woman, and human. Her literary background includes a BA in Poetics and English Literature from Portland State University-Portland, OR, time spent on the editorial staff of VoiceCatcher: Women's Literary Magazine, and ghost writing for several authoritative voices in the newborn care and parenting community. Her current goals include licensing as a Sex & Couple's Therapist with an emphasis on the perinatal time period and, sooner than later, becoming a mother herself.
Grace Ostan
Writer
Grace resides in North Carolina and is wife to her sweetheart Jeff and mother to her son Forrest and daughter Fern. She practices as a Family Nurse Practitioner with a passion for palliative and end of life care. She serves as adjunct faculty at the local university in the School of Nursing where she teaches a public health course. Grace has her Doctorate in Nursing and was the lead investigator of a research study in Haiti analyzing maternal and infant health and local birth practices. She is passionate about topics ranging from global health to marriage, birth, motherhood, and sexuality. Grace finds joy in the seasonal rhythms of life. These days, you might find her relishing the simple pleasures of time spent in the garden, nursing her baby girl to sleep, playing puppets with her son, or enjoying a glass of wine with her husband on the back porch.
Crystal Quayle
Writer
Crystal is the mother of a joyful and spirited 4 year old, named Nevena, an angel baby up in heaven, and a rainbow baby now 17 months, named Maia. Crystal is currently a working at home mother, raising her children, going to therapy weekly, and running a photography business. She has a background in education, and experience teaching students ranging from pre-k to elementary age. She has a strong passion for creativity and technology, and even helped develop educational apps and educational activities at Duck Duck Moose and Khan Academy Kids. She is passionate about our children’s future and continuing her own learning. Someday, she hopes to go back to school and obtain her masters degree. For now, Crystal is soaking in all of the joys that motherhood brings, and hopes to inspire comfort to any other mothers out there struggling.
Lisa Alexander
Writer
Hello, I’m Lisa. I’m pleased to join the Motherhood Pages community as a writer and contributor to the community. I am a mother to a 10-year-old daughter, who I have raised as a single-parent her entire life. I am grateful for the opportunity to share my unique and diverse perspective. While I embrace a lifestyle focused on health, wellness, self-love and spiritual growth, I straddle the fast-paced, conventional, and corporate world that in many ways often contradict one another. As I gain the wisdom and teaching(s) of my life experience(s), I’ve begun to see some of the synchronicities between these polarities. I am excited to share some of these experiences with this community of mothers.
Toni Kiser
Writer
Toni Kiser is mother to an extremely active and mentally hungry 2-year old. She spends her days chasing her daughter around museums, reading books about dinosaurs, dancing in the living room, or smeared in paint or play-dough. In her B.C. (before child) life, she was paralegal to the vice president and general counsel of an academic publisher. Now, instead of researching statutes or case law, she researches dinosaur activities, craft ideas, and toddler-approved recipes. It's the best job she's ever had - it's grueling and thankless, sometimes lonely, and challenging in ways she couldn't have possibly comprehended in her former life, but also the only job she's ever done purely for herself and for love.
Gina Soltman
Writer
Gina Soltman is a married mother of 4 in a blended family, a grandmother of 3 boys, and a recent empty nester! She has recently rediscovered her love of writing and is eager to connect with other women and mothers through the process of shared experiences. She feels deeply that the most powerful way in which we can honor one another is by telling our stories and allowing others to tell theirs. It is the most validating and valuable tool we have.
Lena Schmidt
Writer
Lena has experience teaching yoga, outdoor education, college writing, social justice, K-12, ESL, dance, and gymnastics. Lena finds that the physical and spiritual aspects of yoga aid in the never-ending search for peace, calm, and positivity within. Lena is intentional about taking yoga off the mat and loves finding the bridges between the heart and mind, the individual and community, and mindfulness and expression. Lena is also a Teaching Assistant for the Dimensions of Culture Program at UC San Diego, a writer, an avid hiker, trained as a Wilderness First Responder, and leads outdoor adventure/yoga retreats around the world. She is currently living on a wild acre in Humboldt County with her dog and three chickens.
Cindy Lieberman
Writer
Cindy recently retired from her job as the manager of the UCLA Extension Writers’ Program where she worked for more than 20 years. Her essays and articles have been published in the LA Times, the Daily News, LA Parent Magazine and on various now-defunct websites. She says her best days are the ones that don’t begin with an alarm clock, and she’s happy to connect and compare notes with other grandparents and/or retirees who are also living the dream.