How many more nights will I get to nurse you to sleep? To hold you across my lap with your head resting heavy on my arm? How many more times will I get to feel your entire body relax into mine as you drift to sleep? To feel your gentle suckling every so often as you sink deeper into rest?
You’ll be three years old next week. How can this be? I’m endlessly proud of you, endlessly grateful for you. I’m in love with the person you are and who you’re becoming every day. Always my baby. Always a gift to be able to make you feel safe and loved in that transition from day to night, from awake to asleep, from consciousness to dreams. I treasure each night I get with you, knowing that one day you won’t need this comfort. And I hope when that day arrives I’ll be able to rest in the knowing that you feel that safety because of these nights, because of this closeness, even though the bittersweet-ness will no doubt try to kill me.
